How To Make Friends In High School Even If You’re Shy: 16 Hacks For Teens

“People over time gain social skills,” says Katherine Fiori, a professor of psychology at Adelphi University, New York. You could read our piece on how our friendship strategies change over our lifetime, and consider if your own social goals fit your current needs – or if it could be worth modifying them. Boosting the strength and quality of our social ties can have a huge impact on our emotional and mental health. As one of our writers, David Robson, notes, our friendships can “influence everything from our immune system’s strength to our chances of dying from heart disease”, and can even help us lead a longer life. And in the midst of an apparent loneliness epidemic, it could be the medicine we all need. As friendships evolve, support your colleagues through professional and personal challenges.

I used to hold on to old slights, thinking I was protecting myself from feeling wronged again. But I was really just blocking myself from developing meaningful connections. It’s amazing what happens when you let the walls down and just admit when you’re wrong.

People who share passions, values, or even past experiences create stronger connections through enriching conversations and rewarding interactions. Not only does it relieve the burden of doing all the talking, but it also shows that you’re genuinely interested in getting to know them. It’s an excellent https://asianfeels.weebly.com/ building block for true friendship because it creates personal connections. Making friends as an adult is hard enough, even for the most outgoing people.

Being shy can have a negative impact on your life that goes beyond having a desolate social calendar. Recently, I had a disagreement with a friend, and instead of letting myself feel resentful (which would have been my natural reaction years ago), I reached out to him to apologize, and we worked it out. For a friendship to last, the other person must matter more than our pride. Caroline is the founder of The Introverted Misfit, a community committed to helping socially inept people become more socially confident in themselves. You’ll also probably find that your self-confidence will lower, because you’ll wonder if the people you’re around are really interested in your true self or if they are just attracted to what they think you are.

So, in this article, I want to share some tips that I think can help you become a more socially confident version of your introverted self in time. Once you’re comfortable around certain people, it will be easier for you to navigate conversations and take initiative. Focus on long-term things or events such as classes, teams, clubs, or volunteer positions where you’d bump into the same people. Moreover, if there are problematic people in a social set-up, the stakes can get higher. Your body language speaks a lot about you, so make sure it seems friendly and inviting to the other person.

If someone invites you to a house party, a study session, or just to get a coffee together- say yes! You might feel that you’re not in the mood to socialize, but you might feel better once you’re there and might even enjoy their company. Anytime you have a negative voice in your head telling you that you are too shy or too weird, pause for a moment and think about your positive qualities instead. Tell yourself that you are talented, creative, and deserving of making good friends. Manageable steps such as maintaining eye contact, smiling more often to people, and initiating a ‘hi’ or ‘hello’ when you see someone can boost your confidence. The key to making friends when you’re shy is to be willing to take the initiative to reach out to others.

Plus, when you partner up, you might find shared interests and hobbies, which can lead to awesome friendships outside of class too. When you’re in high school, it’s super tempting to want to fit in or be like someone else, especially if it seems like they’re making friends easily. “If it feels uncomfortable to straight up ask a co-worker to hang out, start by asking them to get a coffee with you or have lunch in the break room,” says DeWall. “There is typically a fixed amount of time at work to connect which might make it easier to push past the discomfort of getting to know someone.” So here are the best ways to meet friends as a shy person, according to experts.

Here are seven tips for making friends when it just feels too scary to walk up to strangers and say hello. If you struggle to initiate conversations, start by asking open-ended questions. These types of questions encourage the other person to share more about themselves and keep the conversation flowing, taking the pressure off you to come up with something to say.

Recognizing and honoring these boundaries fosters mutual respect and trust, which are essential for lasting workplace friendships. Group settings can be overwhelming for shy individuals, but they also offer opportunities to interact with multiple colleagues simultaneously. Preparing in advance and observing group dynamics can help build confidence.

When you’re there for others, they’ll appreciate your kindness and be more likely to want to be friends with you. Joining clubs and groups in high school, whether it’s for sports, drama, or science, is an awesome way to meet other students who like the same things you do. When you really engage with what matters to them, you might discover things you both like, which can lead to deeper talks and closer bonds. On the other hand, when you’re real and show who you truly are, you attract people who like and appreciate you for who you truly are. But the truth is, being yourself is the most important thing when it comes to making real friends.

Whether you’re new to a city or looking to expand your social circle, Bumble For Friends is a fast-track way to create platonic connections and find new friends with similar hobbies and interests. Friend apps can be an amazing way to meet new friends, and more people are using these apps to connect with people. The key to being successful on this app is to create a profile that represents the “real” you. Don’t create a picture-perfect profile of what you think people want in a friend. In order to be happy and to get what you want from life, you need to be able to get along with others.

Shy People Take Note! Here Are Some Ways To Become Less Of An Introvert

Reports suggest that many adults report having few friends or none at all. Among millennial-aged adults, 27% report that they have no close friends. Societal trends appear to be playing a part, but there are individual factors that may also contribute to the lack of friendships. Establishing workplace friendships is just the beginning; maintaining them requires consistent effort. Regular communication, whether through check-ins or casual chats during breaks, demonstrates your ongoing interest in the friendship and helps keep the connection alive despite busy schedules. Paying attention to verbal and nonverbal cues can help you gauge how comfortable your colleagues are with various topics.

Making the choice to be social is especially difficult at the end of an exhausting day when your impulse may be to veg out on the couch. This is why having plans on the docket — and sticking to them — is so crucial. Keep your social calendar populated with friend dates and try to avoid bailing (even if you want to).

As a bit of an introvert, a slow and steady approach makes it easier to open up to people. This verse is a favorite at weddings, so most people think that it refers to romantic love. However, the verse is much more inclusive; it’s about fellowship.

Aside from that, focus on clubs, classes, teams, or volunteer positions that are longer-term, or that go for a few weeks at the very least. It’s probably not possible that everyone at your school dislikes you. If you’re shy, it’s probably more accurate to say that most people at your school don’t really know you. This is something you can change by making more of an effort to meet and talk to people. Once you make some new friends, it’s really important to maintain those relationships by making an effort to keep in touch with friends. Some people who are shy or introverted have a bad habit of going MIA for long stretches of time, and some friends will take this personally.

People can sense when someone is being fake or insincere, so be true to yourself. This is when having a shy or timid personality can actually work in your favor. In a room full of egos, or over confident and arrogant people, you will stand out for all the right reasons. For example, a book discussion group at a local library, or a drop-in night at a board game cafe.

• You probably already know to do this, but look for get togethers where overeager guys are scarce or the circumstances force them to be on better behavior.
• But the truth is, being yourself is the most important thing when it comes to making real friends.
• These things take work when you’re shy, but if you try, you’ll find that they are very much attainable goals.
• “If it feels uncomfortable to straight up ask a co-worker to hang out, start by asking them to get a coffee with you or have lunch in the break room,” says DeWall.

Stop Pretending To Be Someone You’re Not

It won’t take much time for these habits to become second nature. One of the key strengths of shy individuals is often their ability to listen attentively. Being a good listener is a powerful way to form connections, as it shows that you care about the other person and their experiences.

Conclusion: Embrace Your Shyness And Build Friendships At Your Own Pace

Participating in work-related projects that align with your interests facilitates meaningful interactions. Collaborating on tasks that excite you increases the likelihood of encountering colleagues who share your enthusiasm. This shared passion can serve as the foundation for deeper relationships, as working toward common goals fosters camaraderie and mutual respect.

You don’t need to be a social butterfly; sometimes, you may just need one or two good friends. So if you feel like you have no friends, it can be helpful to take time to cultivate a nurture a few close friendships. People who don’t have friends might be referred to as shy, reticent, unsociable, or loners.

Look for low-key opportunities to interact with others in a way that feels more comfortable for you. Throughout school and college, I always envied people who could befriend everyone around them. And while I’d much rather read a book on the train than get stuck talking to the stranger next to me, I always wondered if I lacked something needed to form the lasting friendships I craved. Shyness can be a challenge in all social situations, but challenges can be overcome.